Faith and Depression
Before you read the following blog post, I’d like to thank Pastor Mike Matousek for helping me with this blog post. He shared a sermon which he gave to his congregation in the past. Several of the paragraphs are his hard work and heart.
A Moral Failing?
In times not very long ago, it was very shameful to have depression. If you had depression, you kept it quiet as others would think you were a weak person or a sinner. It’s really important for the church to recognize the severity and widespread nature of anxiety and depression. There are many different forms of these illnesses, but the Institute for Mental Health has stated that somewhere between 18-22% of the US population lives with clinical anxiety conditions, and 1 in 7 Americans suffer depression every year. It’s amazing if you are one of those how often we feel isolated and alone isn’t it despite overwhelming evidence that there are many people in a similar situation.
Growing up during the 70’s and 80’s in a very conservative household, experiencing anxiety and depression was not acceptable. It was sinful as it showed a lack of trust in God’s sovereign character. Certainly, antidepressants and therapy were unacceptable treatment and one needed to trust God for healing as psychology was man’s answers to the problem of sin. Of course, there were black and white convictions about most everything else in our home. Things were either bad or good. Evil or pure. Sinful or godly. There was no gray. When I experienced repeated trauma as young child it was swept under the proverbial rug. It was expected that God would deal with the perpetrator in the end and I was not to allow the distress to overcome me. The struggle with shame and guilt which occurred throughout my life, turned into depression, anxiety, and panic, and left me feeling as though I had been abandoned by God because of the filthy condition of my trampled heart and soul. As a teenager and young adult, I believed that my anxiety and depression would keep me from heaven and send me straight to the pit of hell.
Awhile back, our pastor gave a sermon on anxiety using Philippians 4:4-6. Particularly, the sermon focused on verse 6 and 7 which says, ‘Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (NIV). He did an excellent job but it made me think about my own anxiety and panic attacks. Does that mean that when I have anxiety and panic that I am sinning against God?
First, we need to understand what Philippians 4:6-7 is talking about when it is says not to be “anxious.” The King James Version uses the phrase “careful for nothing” and indicates that we are not to worry about the future or what will happen. We are not to be “full of care” about things we do not have control over. the Bible never condemns these mental illnesses as sinful. This is where it is critical to note the difference between worry and the mental illnesses of anxiety and depression. It is easy for us to worry about our family, jobs, finances, a world-wide pandemic, forest fires, riots and racism in our country. Paul is exhorting us to not allow these things to consume our thoughts and control us. In other words, he exhorts us not to allow worries to separate us from him. In Matthew 6 Jesus said, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat and drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?” (vs. 25) “Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” (vs. 27). Our response is to pray and ask God for what we need because we have confidence in him alone and not in our own sufficiency. The point is that the mental illness of anxiety and depression are completely different than worry. In Philippians 4, Paul is not expressing that we don’t emotionally feel suffering and to be stoic and robotic. The Bible is full of people that we would call heroes of the faith that would easily be diagnosed with anxiety and depression today.
In Psalm 38 David writes that he is “overwhelmed with burdens too heavy to bear.” In Psalm 42 he asks, “Why are you so downcast my soul? Why so greatly disturbed within me?” And in Psalm 13 he begs of God, “How long Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, Lord my God, Give light to my eyes or I will sleep in death…” These psalms are dark and difficult, but I’ve drawn great strength from them as they’ve helped me put words to my feelings and know that God is OK with me not being OK.
After the prophet Elijah performed an amazing miracle with the power of God and has great victory which ended a three-year drought, says in 1 Kings 19, “I’ve had enough, Lord. Take my life, I’m no better than my ancestors.” What was God’s response? He allowed him to sleep, eat and drink, and then he showed Himself to Elijah. It specifically states, “God did not rebuke Elijah.” Instead he showed him love.
Jonah saw God rescue him from the belly of a great fish, and yet he gets to the place where he says in Jonah 4 “Now, O Lord, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live.”
Job suffered greatly and maintained his faithfulness throughout, but he gets to the place where he says in Job 10 “I loathe my very life, therefore I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul.”
The great prophet Jeremiah says in Jeremiah 20, “Cursed be the day I was born…why did I ever come out of the womb to see trouble and sorrow and to end my days in shame?”
Doctor Luke reported in chapter 22 of his gospel that Jesus while praying in the garden of Gethsemane, was in anguish (NIV) or agony (KJV). This was not a physical agony but a spiritual and emotional agony. Jesus himself suffered deeply from the human condition of anxiety and bouts of depression. Isaiah called him a “man of sorrows, acquainted with grief.” In the Gospel of Mark Jesus is recorded as saying, “My soul is deeply grieved to the point of death…” He was in so much anguish and agony that his sweat had blood in it. This is a rare condition called hematidrosis which occurs when a person is under an extreme amount of stress or in acute fear. Capillaries, or small blood vessels, exist around the sweat glands and when the pressure is so great, these capillaries can burst and blood will come from the sweat glands. Our savior, Jesus, was having a bodily reaction to a very real fearful situation. Does that mean Jesus was sinning and not trusting his Father? Jesus’ human body was responding to the way it was created. Just because he trusted the Father, does not mean, he didn’t experience a physiological response.
So, What Do I Do?
When the abuse was inflicted on me over and over, my body went into fight, flight and freeze because of actual fear inducing events. After these abusive episodes stopped, my brain unconsciously remembered these events and activated my sympathetic nervous system at inopportune times. This resulted in panic like symptoms even though there was no immediate danger. There are other reasons that people experience panic including genetic risks. There are certain genes that contribute to a person’s susceptibility of having panic. Chronic stress can change the actual structure of the brain which can contribute to panic and anxiety. Certain temperaments are more prone to panic.
Many well-meaning Christians advise, “Read scripture” or “Just pray about it.” When I was going through my anxiety, I couldn’t do either of those things. I am not saying “be anxious for nothing” and “careful for nothing” doesn’t apply to acute fear reactions and post traumatic stress. Paul says, “in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Unfortunately, when the sympathetic nervous system in engaged, it is nearly impossible for the frontal lobe of the brain, which controls our ability to make rational decisions, to work correctly. One of the greatest gifts was to have others do those things for me. Pray with me. Pray for me.
The longest nerve in our bodies is called the vagus nerve and it is connected to many of our organs. When activated, the vagus nerve can move a person back into the “rest and digest” state. There are many actions that can be taken to help activate this nerve. Some of these include, putting your face in cold water, slow deep breathing, singing, exercise, and massage.
Working with a therapist or counselor can be very helpful. Many people who have not been to therapy imagine laying on a couch in someone’s office spewing free flowing ideas while the therapist takes notes. By attending therapy, you enter a relationship which is based on empathy and learning strategies to help. Therapists can help you to process the reasons behind your anxiety and can teach you problem solving, communication and organizational skills. There are many other beneficial aspects a therapeutic relationship.
Medications can be helpful for anxiety. There are medications for blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, headaches, and infections. Just like all medications, one particular medication doesn’t work for everyone. Just like all medications, there are side effects; however, working with a knowledgeable provider who can discuss the risks and benefits of individual medications is recommended. Often people are afraid that they will have to take medication for the rest of their lives, but this is a rarity. Most people who start a medication for depression or anxiety, generally take them for up to a year and then wean off of them with good outcomes. Medications are often help in conjunction with therapy I order to get the most benefit from the therapeutic process.
These are not “get-better-quick” strategies. Many people suffer with anxiety all their lives. There is healing and improvement. It is reassuring to know our bodies are created by God and that Jesus is our empathetic savior who knows what fear is. He knows what it is to be human. He experienced what we experience and he loves us all the more.
Overwhelmingly the Bible offers compassion to those struggling with mental illness. Matthew 11: “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest…” Psalm 55: “Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you…” Psalm 23: “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil for you are with me…” Mental illness does not cause God to reject you as unfaithful.
It is very clear from these people in the Bible and in my own life, that God can and does use people that are not OK. Sometimes the church inadvertently sends the message that we are too weak, too broken, too fragile to be used by God. It’s a lie. David, Elijah, Jonah, Job, Jeremiah, and Jesus…these are people mightily used by God despite their human frailty. You can be too.
What is true about all of these stories and about mine is that God remained with those that suffered. Psalm 34:18 could easily be the key verse of our entire series on It’s OK to not be OK: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
He is there in the good days and in the dark days too. He doesn’t condemn us for our questions and pain. He doesn’t tell us to just tough it out. He reached down to their deepest pit of suffering, and sits with us. He cares. He shows compassion and offers mercy. He brings hope and instills purpose. He gives victory both in the Bible as well as with you and I today.